In a terrible attempt to show that we do some form of orgainisation, here are the minutes of the last AGM.

The PLC AGM. Saturday 24th June 2006. Elbow Room, Leeds.

PLC Attendees: Coluna, Ken, Trev, Davewam, Szechuan, Pompey, Guiseley, Anderson, Newton.
Other Attendees: Lord Allen-Moy, Eton Al, the blonde barmaid with the nice bristols.

Well folks, it was finally time for the much vaunted PLC AGM. Members came from far and wide to attend such a prestigious occasion, Anderson even passed his driving test the day before just so he could come to Leeds! A lunchtime pint at the Viaduct, spiritual home of the PLC, was followed by a mass rendezvous in the Elbow Rooms, the designated location for the next 9 hours of football, pool, beer, japes, high jinks and, of course, business. Once the food finally arrived, we got down to business (Your mum got down to business). Below are something approximating minutes for what was discussed and decided and from anything else I can remember from yesterday that may or may not be of interest.

1) Coluna’s Speech. The basic gist was that he didn’t know what train he was on, he thought he may be Squires, but we weren’t sure.
2) Coluna takes credit for ‘Packing Squires off to Spain’.
3) Coluna retains his chairmanship in a close contest, pipping Squires to the post by a close margin of 13 votes to 0. Such was Squires desperation to win that he didn’t even vote for himself!
4) The role of Media Officer. Another hard-fought election campaign by both sides culminated in Trev retaining his position by 12 votes to 2.
5) Panda alleges sexual advances on someone’s mother.
6) Davewam representing the Paedo Party retains his position as Membership Officer.
7) Nick retains his position of Projects Officer.
8) PLC Secretary. At the last minute Samuel Newton threw his hat into the ring, to challenge the current incumbent Poshbird who’s on holiday. An initial vote of 7-6 in favour of the incumbent was challenged by the hopeful, and a recount was performed. This time the scores were reversed, so another recount was demanded in which Newton claimed victory by 9 votes to 4. The PLC Committee would at this juncture like to thank Poshbird for her efforts over the past year and acknowledge her continuing devotion to the cause.
9) Ken retains his position as official ‘Organiser of Shit’ by a resounding 13 votes to 0.
10) Zaius is retained as Webmaster, again claiming a 13-0 margin.
11) An additional category was set up, the ‘PLC Scapegoat’. In a tight contest, Squires beat off the competition of Owen Hargreaves, Alcohol, the Jews and their Zionist conspiracy and an actual goat. So congratulations to you sir.
12) Coluna’s speech to end the elections was somewhat incoherent and can only accurately be described as drivel. ‘Thank you, bigger than ever, premium, number one supporters group’ was all that could be deciphered. He also made the startling accusation that, not unlike the plot of the film ‘Junior’, he has given birth to Adi Mowles child. Methinks a scandal begins to brew.
13) Likely first PLC game of the season, probably with a Blue Moon to, will be Bristol Rovers at home on the opening game of the season.
14) Sack Lynn for being unloyal? Disloyal! And for joining in fun in a way that excludes her employer. And sack her for being an absolute idiot, and inefficient. Lynn can you call Bill Oddie….
15) Then there was something said about player sponsorship and a pirate party.
16) Ed got her drunk and knobbed her.
17) Dennis Pearce! We need an action plan, Nick as projects manager is in charge of this and potentially acquiring habits.
18) A maximum of 14 votes for a position out of a membership of c45 is disgraceful and whoever’s in charge of Membership and that stuff needs to increase the turnout for next years event, even if it be by post.
19) Any other business? No I didn’t think so.

And with that the meeting itself ended. We then proceeded to get rather rowdy whilst watching ze Germans play the flat-pack ace of base bastards, and playing a version of Beermat Bingo or something like that in which various people that weren’t me won money. Which was rather disheartening.

Then the PLC pool tournament began, it was all rather complicated, essentially there was a preliminary round and then quarters, semi’s, a final and a ¾ place playoff. I graciously lost to our chairman and Eton Al beat Pompey in the preliminaries. Into the quarters, Anderson beat the Centipaedo, Ken routed the Panda, Newton defeated Guiseley and Eton Al beat Coluna. Anderson then beat Eton Al, and Newton beat Kenneth in the semis. Eton Al claimed third place against Ken, before Anderson squeezed past Newton for the win, becoming the 2006 PLC Pool Champion in the process. Congratulations to you sir.

From then on more supping was done, we watched the argies beat meh-he-ho, began to perv somewhat at the lovely ladies around us, particularly the one in the red flowery dress with the marvellous legs. People began to drift off back from whence they came. Pompey and Trev went back up Headingley way for a brew and a rather dirty curry. Coluna and Panda went to Yate’s (the wine lodge, classy), and were molested by a revolting grannie, before they headed off to Bondi Beach Club for some reason or other, where they were accosted by a hen-do, and Coluna was laughed at by the bouncers for having a teddy bear in his bag. And then twas time for home, with everyone feeling rather worse for wear. But on the plus side, a successful day, a fun day, and I managed to acquire another Cameroon shirt in mint condition for £8. Result. See you next year!